How should I start? This story is somehow related to the SK forum that I joined not very long ago. Somehow my resume landed to the mailbox of KHA. After having read some of my postings in SK and my resume, he thought he must help me. (Apparently some big shot see me as someone with 'potential' just through my rambling & the way I think)
For a small fry like me, who's just coming to term with grasping the gist of life out of the comfort zone, it is always overwhelming to meet or to have met, or being associated with the big guns. I was almost shaking at my knees, but I had to keep up with the corporate image, and try to smile as humble as I could, although at times I dont know what the heck these people were talking about.
So AC is level 5? (Huh?! how do I not reveal the 'meijoonised' look when that question is posed to me?) What were they comparing about between Malaysia and India in terms of having CMMI? (luckily I remembered the jargon, and found the answers later thru surfing the net)
Back to why I was having this lunch date, there 2 agenda at the same table, and it was held during lunch, when you're suppose to eat and digest your food. I thought it was KHA's way of killing 3 birds with 1 stone! On one side of the table, he was dealing with some business with party, and on my side, KHA was trying to introduce me to one young CEO of a very promising technology development house which is making its mark overseas instead of locally, due to the niche market.
Actually I still cant believe that guy is younger than his looks. Seriously at only 30 or less than 30 and being CEO of his own profit-making SME, it just amazed me, how he could actually achieve all that impressive result by himself?! Even if he's got mentor or sponsor from other people, still he atleast must have that strong desire and immense capacity to make things work! My admiration goes out to these young technopreneur, my hats off to them.
But in the end, did I meet his eye? No. I was described by him as "too green" and "raw". I lack the experience, and even if came from AC, I wasn't involved with the 'in and out' of the business, which could be beneficial to him. He needed a 'sleek operator'. (halt -- I try so hard not to give him that doh face).
His english already so powderful, what more with all the jargons and technical terms they used. I wonder how could I even achieve half as what he's got in his belt by the time I'm his age?! His advice is for me to take risk, and be willing to do something else or just go ahead to gain more experience, in the industry. He said maybe after 1-2 years more experience, then maybe I'd be more useful to him :(
At that point, I was so tempted to want to brag, and try to convince him that I can do it whatever he wants me to do! But somehow, reality check, I know a guy like him who'd so sure of what he wants, will not buy in what I'm trying to sell which doesn't meet his requirement! A buyer will always have the priviledge to survey, and to choose the best valued product in the market!
If I want to start selling in a niche market, I must be able to stand out and proof to potential buyers its their lost of not buying me! ;P haha, crap on mei joon.
Another underlying question people will ask - what do you want?! Although I've asserted what I want, it is as though people can feel that there is 'more to what I can say I want'. I want to do so many things in my life, there is no ONE thing that I WANT, I just want to try everything, and do anything I like, and my list of interests is probably endless. All subjects in school I like, most channels on TV I watch, camping outdoor or indoor I've tried. Writing, travelling, picturetaking, meeting people and collecting stamps or postcards are my passion. Sports, music, politics, religion, or even finance I have a say.
What could possibly be my next job in line? Mr. KHA even asked if I wanna join the Sun, theStar or NST?! ;-D (in my head, I thought why not tv8 or Ntv7 as newscaster doh). I need to carry on my search for my next path of career, it is like back to square one. Like my astrology-consultant said to me, I'll always be studying. (if you could make sense of that?!).
Maybe I shouldn't think too much, just go with the flow. The flow now is learn Alcatel switch!! Irrrgggshhhhhh.....
Wednesday, March 30, 2005
Wednesday, March 23, 2005
So what else to blog?!
Wah.. what kinda post title is that? Well what to do, dont really know how to write in here when I discovered more and more people know the existance of it. Its like the flesh is revealed and you have no more enthusiasm to want to shoot all that you want, which is illogical to read.
Then I came up with different blog for different functions!!! Yup.. like this one that I can reveal but enter, at your own risk hehe! Since I actually want to influence people to really think about how we can shape for a better country, that is Malaysia.
The other blogs that I came up with, just purely for me to vent my energy inside. You just know that somethings in Virgoan cannot be discovered. I just dont know why.
Once I was asked "why dont I talk like I write?"... I was dumbfounded. If I could talk like I write, then I must be holding a walking-dictionary with me?! All my writings relies alot on dictionary to check out the real meaning of words that I tend to simply use. And then I would have to hit the backspace and delete key very often, in speeches how do I undo?! Eh, come to think of it, when I couldn't express my words through my mouth, does that makes me a very self-conscious person? Hmm.. (i just went to check dictionary.com) and found out selfconcious also mean insecure or shy! Whoaah!! See... I thought selfconcious is just a problem where I need to keep checking myself if I did something wrong or right, good or bad. Wait... how come that contradicts me being nonchalant or calm? No, how can I ever be calm, when I get excited easily and cry at any movie?
GEEeeeeee.... again I'm going no where in my rambling, today I did nothing at all productive in the office. Except I went to restart the server - yep that should resolve one silly problem. How can I not get away with this laidback job!
Should I take up the admin job if I do get the offer? Its from UNDP. Well just becos its related to the UN, doesn't mean I should lower down my expectation and not challenge myself so much, to accept a very easy job? Why do I need to be on par with people doing great job out there? How come I could be affected by society? How many times must I ask why why why?
Where did this negative emotion come from? Where is the spark that triggered the rise of jealousy thought? Isit not Upekka (equanimity) that I try to practise? Maybe I should try practising Mudita - sympathetic joy - instead. Must be happy for other people acheiving better results than me! Uurrssshhhh by saying that, I just 'forced' it out so hard. If I didn't mean it I should say nor write it!
Well... I say I will TRY to practise Mudita la, at best I know I've tried at the very least!! No, I will put my right effort to overcome my negativity, and think positive, that I can soon have alot of Mudita!! haha..
Hey every possibility begins with a hope or a wish! Ha, I just coined out a saying! Cool. Enough of crap for today.
Then I came up with different blog for different functions!!! Yup.. like this one that I can reveal but enter, at your own risk hehe! Since I actually want to influence people to really think about how we can shape for a better country, that is Malaysia.
The other blogs that I came up with, just purely for me to vent my energy inside. You just know that somethings in Virgoan cannot be discovered. I just dont know why.
Once I was asked "why dont I talk like I write?"... I was dumbfounded. If I could talk like I write, then I must be holding a walking-dictionary with me?! All my writings relies alot on dictionary to check out the real meaning of words that I tend to simply use. And then I would have to hit the backspace and delete key very often, in speeches how do I undo?! Eh, come to think of it, when I couldn't express my words through my mouth, does that makes me a very self-conscious person? Hmm.. (i just went to check dictionary.com) and found out selfconcious also mean insecure or shy! Whoaah!! See... I thought selfconcious is just a problem where I need to keep checking myself if I did something wrong or right, good or bad. Wait... how come that contradicts me being nonchalant or calm? No, how can I ever be calm, when I get excited easily and cry at any movie?
GEEeeeeee.... again I'm going no where in my rambling, today I did nothing at all productive in the office. Except I went to restart the server - yep that should resolve one silly problem. How can I not get away with this laidback job!
Should I take up the admin job if I do get the offer? Its from UNDP. Well just becos its related to the UN, doesn't mean I should lower down my expectation and not challenge myself so much, to accept a very easy job? Why do I need to be on par with people doing great job out there? How come I could be affected by society? How many times must I ask why why why?
Where did this negative emotion come from? Where is the spark that triggered the rise of jealousy thought? Isit not Upekka (equanimity) that I try to practise? Maybe I should try practising Mudita - sympathetic joy - instead. Must be happy for other people acheiving better results than me! Uurrssshhhh by saying that, I just 'forced' it out so hard. If I didn't mean it I should say nor write it!
Well... I say I will TRY to practise Mudita la, at best I know I've tried at the very least!! No, I will put my right effort to overcome my negativity, and think positive, that I can soon have alot of Mudita!! haha..
Hey every possibility begins with a hope or a wish! Ha, I just coined out a saying! Cool. Enough of crap for today.
Thursday, March 10, 2005
~ sweet Sepet ~
The movie ended on a two thumbs up for me. I cried uncontrollably in the car as I was driving back home from the cinema. It was such a feel good movie, I really felt like I could appreciate the storyline and the message that the writer wanted to portray.
When asked what do I think about the ending -- I said it was like "sei mei" -- and my friend replied "kau lat". Which is true. Somehow I could predict the ending (or I was told about the ending before), I didn't expect the effect of the ending could make me cry - nonstop!
This is the type of ending which I dread if I'm watching a movie in a fully-packed screen. Luckily YT has 2 more pieces of tissue paper left, my eyes were soaking wet and my nose yucks!
There was this part I laughed so hard, until I virtually fall off the chair. As you know I was sitting at the edge of the row, rolling off the chair would not disturb any neighbour.
I wanted Malaysians all to 'read between the lines' of the story. It serves as a great discovery medium for my foreign friends to grasp the essence of a typical country -- Malaysia.
On a personal note, I felt a little baffled at myself when I could not imagine how the writer could write such an original piece of Malaysian story. So much for dreaming for bangsa Malaysia, when I myself couldn't yet come to term with converting to another religion if I ever come near to dating a Muslim / Malay. Yet there is this strong urge in my mind that support interracial unity, and probably even interracial marriage! I admire the writer's boldness, wit and charm.
I usually admire people or things that I couldn't achieve or think of myself.
I urge and strongly recommend every youth to check out the movie - SEPET - and see it with your heart, not with your mind.
It was a sweet movie right from the start. How could you not catch something that sweet?! Thinking back... I'm feel like crying again.
Here's a link to the Story Teller herself & a marvelous review that I could really relate to, just read it!
When asked what do I think about the ending -- I said it was like "sei mei" -- and my friend replied "kau lat". Which is true. Somehow I could predict the ending (or I was told about the ending before), I didn't expect the effect of the ending could make me cry - nonstop!
This is the type of ending which I dread if I'm watching a movie in a fully-packed screen. Luckily YT has 2 more pieces of tissue paper left, my eyes were soaking wet and my nose yucks!
There was this part I laughed so hard, until I virtually fall off the chair. As you know I was sitting at the edge of the row, rolling off the chair would not disturb any neighbour.
I wanted Malaysians all to 'read between the lines' of the story. It serves as a great discovery medium for my foreign friends to grasp the essence of a typical country -- Malaysia.
On a personal note, I felt a little baffled at myself when I could not imagine how the writer could write such an original piece of Malaysian story. So much for dreaming for bangsa Malaysia, when I myself couldn't yet come to term with converting to another religion if I ever come near to dating a Muslim / Malay. Yet there is this strong urge in my mind that support interracial unity, and probably even interracial marriage! I admire the writer's boldness, wit and charm.
I usually admire people or things that I couldn't achieve or think of myself.
I urge and strongly recommend every youth to check out the movie - SEPET - and see it with your heart, not with your mind.
It was a sweet movie right from the start. How could you not catch something that sweet?! Thinking back... I'm feel like crying again.
Here's a link to the Story Teller herself & a marvelous review that I could really relate to, just read it!
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