CMMI KPI.. sigh..

11am SATURDAY morning, I dragged myself up this morning, feeling like shit, yet have to rush off to Cyberjaya, that's 35 mins drive away from home, having to go through 2 tolls. I am still like a zombie now.

Weekdays are really a blessing! Having to go to work only at Section 13, that's less than 10 mins drive from home without the jam. Some say I could even walk to work! The corporate culture at clientsite during weekdays is not so tensed up, although there's SLA to meet, but basically the project is in stable mode. Besides, fellow teammate, a sweet looking chinese guy who's kinda warm and friendly. Probably a fella who's very willing to help if I have any query. He just join few weeks before me. Oh ya, he walks nearly 1km away to Amcorp for lunch everday, to read the novel he's been following for free at Popular bookstore.

As for me, I walk to the M&M Cafe around the corner, to indulge my lunch in a cozy ambience of soft jazz tunes, nice table cloth with aircon! At about RM4.50 for mixrice, I feel that's really alright for me, who previously based in Putrajaya.

Talking abt SATURDAYS... when I have to drag myself up to "report to work" back at my own employer's office - its really DREADFUL! It's not just "scary"... well MAYBE there is a certain "fear" developed inside me, towards the boss. That's not because of his robot attitude, its the fear of "not living up to the expectation" that is residing inside my body. The mind is very lazy, the heart is calling me to sleep and the body is dragging.

Maybe it's a challenge, obviously it is, trying to cook up with something even Jaya Shanker have no means to save me. Only thank Salim who'd actually clever enough to "show me the way" - atleast, one of the way, to search through an exclusive knowledge-exchange web portal, that only certain people would have access to. Mudzaffar to the rescue!

One of the boss actually wrote in his email asking me to show him 1st draft by tomorrow (that's yesterday, the email arrived Thursday). I pengsan... I dont even he wants to see "first draft" of WHAT?!!! So after clarifying and roughly knowing what he wants, STILL the SOLUTION to his request, requires a hell lot of "information" and probably "experience"!

There would be 3... THREE first draft that I'd to cook up with by next Saturday... I've suggested that he's review my 0.5 version first, before I even call it 1st draft. That means, I have to show him alpha version first, before beta.. whatever.

I'm going to be really zombie now... why is it so hard for me, maybe because I'm not used to this sorta tight schedule and supreme expectation. Esp not for work, where the end doesn't justify the mean.

Can I quit?! Sigh... no I dont think I'm such a loser. Well, actually I cant quit, when under probation, I still have to give 2 months notice period. Like, wtf... You see, beggers dont choose.

Nevermind... I'll give myself 2 years. And hopefully when I'm 30, I could call it a day. You know, kick back relax and enjoy life doing only the things that inspires me to do.

Let's count the hour for now, by 1pm I'll be gone. Sometimes I wonder why American systems are so powerful, and Malaysia is struggling.. that's another story.